How to become irreplaceable in your relationship 1

It is important that everyone knows the great value competence can add to the life, relationship and marriage of an individual and the havoc incompetence can also cause to the life of an individual who neglect this truth. This has been part of the most crucial unrevealed and undiscovered secret behind many breakups and divorce.

The word “mystery” literarily means hidden truths or treasury of information’s, while “competence” is the ability of an individual to do what he/she knows how to do in an exceptional way or manner. Therefore, the goal of this post (teaching) is to unveil hidden truths and that everyone will be able to accurately conduct a survey or a check on him/herself to know if he/she is really competent as an individual and also as parties that comprises a relationship or marriage in the area where there is need for efficiency and accuracy

Also, the goal of this post is to point those areas many people lack competence in their relationship/marriage, even though it is not known to lots of people and thereby causing daily damage to their relationship and marriage. It is true that lots of people are busy and doing many things but how excellent and exceptional are those things being done as a result of being competent

What validates you being valuable is the ability to be skillful uniquely and irreplaceable, once people can easily replace you in any area of life, it is a sign that you are not really valuable. And if this ever happen to you; it is a prove that you are a mediocre and mediocrity don’t stay in the palace but rather on the street

You know how to do many things, your partner loves you and always proud of you for being valuable, my question for you is that; you are valuable to what degree? Can you be easily replaced by men, even by him/her (your partner)? Will it be easy or difficult for such a person to replace you, if YES; then you really have to settle down with this post and read over and over again until you become the result you have always wanted.

 This is part of the reason why heartbreak and divorce in our society worldwide is like buying sachet water on the street, because many people can easily be replaced.  Have you heard people say I am tired of this and that in my relationship but I can’t just let go, sometime it may be that they had really invested in that relationship (investment of any kind; it can be monetary or their body out of lust)

But other times, it may be because the person mean so much to them, they could not replace the person easily, he/she is exceptional when it come to who they are, what they represent and things they do; and the fellow in question will be like; where on earth will I meet someone like this again???

Such individual uniqueness and what make them exceptional may be in the area of phone calls, text message, advice, care, encouragement, understanding, support, healthy believe system, faithfulness, humility, submissiveness, genuine expression of love, etc.

Meditate in one minute and ask yourself this question before we continue:  Can I be replaced easily? Be sincere with your answer, if NO; you are coming up, if YES you are in big trouble and if YOU DON’T KNOW; there is more trouble!!! Have you discovered that you are not competent (you can be easily replaced) in certain areas, did you admit or you allow your ego to keep you there still not to press for growth, change and transformation.

Whichever category you fall in, this post is truly for you. I will list certain areas where people have failed to admit incompetence for the purpose of improvement, which is part of the reason why their relationship/marriage is at the verge of destruction and probably has been stagnant for years.

Sometime, either of the parties will not be able to find out what the problem is actually, but knows with assurance that something is wrong somewhere. This is why someone may not be musically inclined but when he/she listens to good music he/she knows and if it is bad, he/she also knows. People are not foolish, they may not talk, but they know if you are or not!!!!

1. Personal development/transformation: Many people had been stagnant like well water for years and they are not making any attempt for transformation or development, they are just too satisfied with their mediocrity. He/she met you like that 2 years ago, and today you are still the same person he/she met and used to know. That is not a good way to live

What are you doing to increase your knowledge and value, what investment are you making into your life and destiny except from academics, studies, work or business. Do you think if there is need for him/her to replace you tomorrow, excluding the love you shared, will he/she find it difficult???

I was discussing with a dear friend sometimes ago and he told me of a lady who was unapologetically investing in herself, my dear friend was telling me with zeal and passion, trying to imagine what that young lady will grow to become in few years to come, what of you? And what are you growing to become???

Change your mentality today, develop your mind, go back to the previous posts on love and beauty, let it minister fresh to you, stop depending on your beautiful face, good body, nice shape, appealing muscles and neglect the place of personal transformation and mental development. If you neglect it today, you will pay for it tomorrow

2 Mutual growth/influence: You are in that relationship to contribute alongside with one another for the growth of the relationship and you both. If the other party is the only one contributing to the growth of the relationship or marriage always, sooner or later, you may be replaced

Influence is powerful; it is the ability of an individual to sell or communicate his/her idea to people with great conviction without force or cruelty. Ask yourself, what part of him/her have you influenced since you started, has he/she not being the only one making all the inputs and impacts, if this is you, you may be replaced as soon as possible.

It is amazing to see people trying to change others when they need a serious change in that area also, it is really challenging when you see people trying to make contribution for growth in a relationship after ignoring and neglecting the place of personal transformation, mental development and improvement; it will end-up causing catastrophe, because you can’t give what you don’t have

3. Activities in the relationship/marriage: Many people are just living a boring life in their relationship, they don’t know what to do after what, when to do what and so on. Even some young men are confused on what to discus and things to do in the relationship; they were excited from the beginning, but now tired of the whole thing. My question is that; who licensed you to start the relationship???? Relationships are for men and not boys and what qualifies you to be a man is not age but you maturity in all the five levels of human development.

They don’t know when to call, the importance of text message, how to build intimacy with constant, regular and rich communication and messages, most partners including couples don’t chat with one another and they have time to chat with other people. You are not competent in this area, embrace change

Embrace all and every godly (For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who hold the truth in unrighteousness….1);” events and activities that can make your relationship/marriage worthwhile

Don’t engage in sin as singles or married individuals all in the name of making your relationship/marriage worthwhile. Please be guided

Continuation....

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Reference

       Romans 1:18.......1