How to build a healthy and happy relationship/marriage (part 2)

Feelings, emotions, affection and the rest are not love, they are expression of love, if they are mistaken to be love, there will be chaos and issues definitely, because the love on its own will no longer be given attention or value but those things found around it. This exhibition of affections is what majority does to one another and calls it LOVE but it is not.

This post is one of the most valuable write-up I’ve ever written and one of the best posts I’ve ever posted. The day I found this wisdom and truth, my life received a dramatic transformation from being a loser to a winner and since then, I’ve been able to keep and sustain valuable and advantageous relationships

It won’t only enlighten you on how to build and sustain a healthy and happy romantic relationship, but also will introduce you to the true meaning and importance of love in all ramifications

Love is not a product of affections, feelings or emotions. Affections, feelings and emotions are things found around love, they are not love and can never be equated to love. It is like using a perfume and people smells the fragrance of the perfume, the fragrance they smelled is not the perfume you applied but a prove that something is present on you and has affected the environment positively.

Love and infatuation have this attributes in common and it is usually so hard to identify or differentiate them, but soon you will know what you are into, if it is love or infatuation

For God so love the word that He gave us His only begotten son;....1. I established this in theconcept of love that God is love and anyone who will ever love and love genuinely must first know, believe and have God.

The question we should ask is that; can feeling, affection, and emotion cause a personality like God to give out his only beloved son out for the remission of sin, if NO, then what kind of love is it? It is a love birthed out of a conscious and strong decision and not feelings. 

True love is a decision. Affection is a feeling of love or strong attachment to something or someone while feeling is an emotional sensitivity. This is the mystery behind I’m in love today and tomorrow no more, because feelings can end, it can be interrupted but love, NO!

Emotions are not constant; it can come as a result of a scene or an occurrence, and after some time it will vanish. If this is what your love story is founded on, the moment it leaves, your love story also ends.

Many people failed today not because they are bad or lied to be in love, NO; they truly loved from the onset but the love was a product of this affection which they never discovered and after some times, the feeling start depreciating and the end of the matter will be heartbreak

Check your relationship and see if the foundation on which you are building is not this variable called affection. If this is it, you are liable to fail, but I have good news for you, learn this and change your mentality about your relationship and you will be amazed with the result.

Decision is a choice of judgment and judgment is the conclusion of result, therefore with the above two words merged together with their definitions, we can say decision is a choice taking out of the conclusion of a result

Love is starting a relationship and settling down to check, that you may be able to judge rightly what you are about to start and to know if you are right about your intentions or not, after which you come to a conclusion consciously, that you love this person and no matter what the situation, you are ready to stay, stand by and continue life together. Regardless the flaws!!!

It is a conscious decision taken as the conclusion of a sincere and deep thought. This is why you see some people getting married and you are amazed about their physical compatibility

It was so glaring that one is much more handsome or beautiful than the other and you are shocked, asking yourself questions that no one will answer; this is the secret behind it, conscious decision by each party, they concluded that this is him/her and I’m not going back

Do you think one of them was not convinced by friends and family that he/she deserve someone better, but because a decision had been made consciously, they continued till they became a success. 

This is why people continued to break your heart every now and then because it had always being your feelings leading you both and it has always being mistaken for love which is not.

After few months of starting a relationship, you see someone else and all of you was transferred and the next is to breakout from the current one, you will never sustain or build a great and successful relationship and home like that, NO!

Until you consciously make the decision, you will continue to jump from one place to another and one person to another

Married men/women are confused today because they never made this decision; you will always find someone who is better than your partner, more handsome/beautiful than your partner, it is the decision you had taken that will always rescue you from that lust.

You have to sit and re-think, think of all the good qualities your partner has, appreciate those qualities, decide never to lose him/her for anything, think of those things you don’t like about him/her too and deploy a method or plan to help them become better

Stop jumping from here to there in the name of love, I’ve said this in several teachings about a wonderful lady that my friends tried to convince me out of loving or marrying her, they told me she is fat, huge, this and that and after giving birth to two, she will lose shape and all that, but because I’ve decided that she is the one I wanted, all they were saying had no effect on me

I will have many witnesses here that part of the reason you broke those wonderful hearts years past was because you never made a serious decision about them and because of that, you were not committed to them, thinking there is someone better somewhere that you will meet someday.

Are you ready to make a conscious decision now??? You may have gotten married and haven’t decided, get your diary. Are in a relationship or married? Convinced of God but personally, you are yet to decide, do it consciously and with all seriously now and your journey to marital fulfillment will commence

This is why many have not being able to fight for the one they love, any small challenge; they are out and hunting for another person. They believed there will always be an alternative out there. Don’t make mistake by letting your wife/husband be part of those girlfriends/boyfriend that you call ex

Have you even seen someone before and you almost got tamed by his/her handsomeness/beauty; that is how it is, you will always meet people like that, and if you don’t decide today and  stay with your partner unashamedly and unapologetically, you will end up jumping out and continue to jump

Two (2) ways out of this tragedy of love and relationship:

1. Make God the foundation of your relationship; get your conviction so well from God

2 Make a conscious decision about the relationship and the one you claimed to love and you will be fine

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Reference

         John 3:16.......1